


Turn My Blue Heart to Red

by bertee



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Doctor, Alternate Universe - Stripper/Exotic Dancer, Dubcon Kissing, Injury, M/M, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Past Domestic Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-23
Updated: 2011-12-23
Packaged: 2017-11-11 10:03:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/477344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bertee/pseuds/bertee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Doctor!Jensen tries not to fall madly in love with accident-prone stripper!Jared. He is not particularly successful.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Turn My Blue Heart to Red

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fromcainwthlove (Liralen)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Liralen/gifts).



> Written for spn-j2-xmas.

The Friday night shift at the ER was always an interesting one.

Admittedly, it was mostly interesting in the _oh god why would someone think that naked jousting was a good idea_ sense but when it came to minor, non-fatal injuries, Jensen almost looked forward to the variety of alcohol-fueled bad decisions he was presented with on Fridays.

However, he hadn't quite prepared himself for walking into the exam room to find his patient sitting there in assless chaps.

"Uh…"

He looked around, half-expecting Aldis and Kane to leap out from behind the bed with party hats and dollar bills. They'd been threatening to take him to a strip joint ever since he'd broken up with Jason; it made sense that they might've decided to bring the stripper to him instead.

To Jensen's relief, there were no shouts of 'surprise!', and instead of engaging in any actual stripping, assless-chaps guy just looked him up and down with suspicion. "Are you a real doctor?"

Jensen raised his eyebrows. "You know they don't actually let fake doctors work in hospitals, right? I've got a medical degree and everything."

He watched assless-chaps guy carefully. Being mistaken for a hallucination was not an experience Jensen wanted to repeat, especially when the last incident had ended with a patient throwing a bedpan at his head.

Fortunately, assless-chaps guy relaxed and gave him an apologetic smile. "Sorry, man. My buddy keeps saying he's gonna hire me a hot nurse escort the next time I injure myself so I thought…" He trailed off and gestured vaguely at Jensen. "Y'know."

Jensen looked down at himself. Since he wasn't wearing rhinestone encrusted underwear, he was fairly confident that, out of the two of them, he looked the least like a sex worker.

"Hate to burst your bubble," he said dryly, "but I'm definitely a real doctor. Not a nurse hooker."

"Right," assless-chaps guy said with a smile. "Sorry, I didn't mean to jump right to hooking just because you're hot." His eyes went wide. "And god, I shouldn't be calling you hot. I'm sorry," he said again. "Please don't kick me out for sexual harassment. I don't want to get gangrene and die horribly. I promise not to be inappropriate anymore."

It took Jensen a moment to process all the apologies but, convinced that the guy was a legitimate patient, he gave him a smile. "I'm not going to kick you out." Switching back into maximum professionalism mode -- he was a serious doctor, after all -- he picked up the guy's chart and asked, "So what's the problem, Mr…"

"Padalecki," the guy filled in, saving Jensen the task of pronouncing the name scrawled on the chart. There were a lot of vowels involved. "You can call me Jared if you want. Most people do." He paused. "Except my grandma. I think she's still bitter than my parents relegated 'Tristan' to my middle name. Which, personally, I'm grateful for."

Jensen smirked as he scanned Jared's chart. It was nice to put a name to the chaps. "I hear you," he said. "My grandma definitely still judges my parents for making me the grandkid with the weird name."

Jared smiled. "What's that?"

Belatedly, Jensen realized he'd been so distracted by the asslessness of the chaps that he hadn't introduced himself. "Jensen," he said with a self-deprecating shrug. "Dr Ackles, technically."

"If you're nasty?" Jared filled in before clapping a hand over his mouth. "Jesus, how am I sucking so hard at polite adult interaction today?"

"Blame it on the 'open wound on your calf'," Jensen read off the chart. "That affects your politeness. There have been studies."

"Really?"

"No."

Jared laughed. "Guess I should've taken the out without asking questions, huh?"

"That might've been a plan," Jensen agreed. "Okay, how about I take a look at your leg and hopefully let you loose on the world again as quick as possible? Can you roll over onto your stomach for me?"

Jared nodded. "Aye, aye, cap'n." 

"Not a captain either," Jensen said as Jared turned over onto his front. "Still just a doctor."

"They should give you a bonus captaincy as a reward for getting through med school," Jared said, settling himself on his belly. "Like a two for one. You can cut people open _and_ decide whether or not to battle giant squids."

"You have an excellent grasp of those two job descriptions."

Jared looked back over his shoulder with a grin. "I know."

Jensen rolled his eyes and did his best not to look at the curve of Jared's ass, which was highlighted beautifully by the chaps and by the tight sparkly underwear. Instead he looked down to his calves, where one of the legs of his chaps had been popped open to reveal a nasty-looking cut.

"Yeah, that's gonna need stitches," he said, resting his hand on Jared's leg and peering at the wound. "It doesn't look infected though, which should help with your gangrene phobia."

"Gangrene phobia is a totally rational fear," Jared defended. "But lack of gangrene is good. What happens now? Do you just stitch it up and let me go?"

"Something like that," Jensen said, heading over to gather the necessary supplies. In all honesty, he could've just called in an intern -- sutures were a fairly basic procedure -- but the Friday night rush had died down and Jared seemed like better company than the patient with his dick trapped in an inflatable camel. 

Scanning Jared's chart, he double-checked, "Any allergies?"

"Nope," Jared said, wiggling his ass as he got comfortable. "You can put pretty much anything in me."

Jensen arched an eyebrow.

"Uh, in a medical capacity," Jared added lamely as Jensen pulled on a pair of gloves. "Or a food capacity, I guess. Not in an inappropriate capacity because I am definitely not being inappropriate anymore."

"Good to know," Jensen said, folding his pant-leg out of the way and swabbing the skin. "Okay, I'm gonna give you a local anesthetic, then clean your wound and put in some sutures. Sound good?"

"As good as having sharp things jabbed into my leg can sound," Jared agreed.

Trying to distract him as he administered the anesthetic, Jensen asked, "So what happened? How'd you get a cut this bad?"

Jared buried his head in his arms. For a second, Jensen was concerned he was in pain but he soon realized it was shame rather than agony when Jared mumbled, "Man, I was so hoping you weren't gonna ask me that."

"It's kind of my job," Jensen pointed out, cleaning the wound out and watching for flinches. "If it helps, I've probably seen way more embarrassing injuries than this."

Jared sighed. "It was a giant plastic pumpkin."

Jensen briefly pictured a sentient plastic pumpkin bouncing around with a knife clutched in its little pumpkin hand. He then came back to reality. "You know Halloween was two weeks ago, right?"

"Right," Jared said. "But I wasn't working that week so I missed the pumpkin cage. We found it in storage tonight so I figured I'd try it out but I accidentally knocked it over while I was inside it and I cut my leg when it broke."

Readying the needle for the sutures, Jensen paused as he tried to parse everything Jared had just said. "The pumpkin was a cage?" 

"Uh-huh."

The logical follow-up question was 'do you work in a holiday-themed sex dungeon?' but Jensen went with the marginally more tactful, "Where do you work that has a pumpkin cage big enough to fit people in?"

"Cahoots," Jared said matter-of-factly.

Jensen blinked. "Wait, _Cahoots_? The strip joint?"

"Well, yeah." Jared sounded confused. "I mean, I guess I could just take my clothes off in public but doing it at a strip club seemed like a better choice."

Things suddenly made a lot more sense. 

"So the chaps…"

"Man, I'm sorry about that," Jared said apologetically as Jensen got to work on the sutures. "I was gonna change into jeans or something but my leg kept bleeding and I figured it would be easier to just pop these open instead of ruining some pants I actually like." He glanced back over his shoulder with a bashful smile. "I kinda forgot about the underwear until I got here though. They look so much more sparkly under bright lights."

"I'm dazzled," Jensen deadpanned.

"What, don't you get a ton of guys in here in chaps and twinkly underwear?" Jared said, aghast. "Way to shatter my impressions of the entire medical profession, Dr Ackles."

Jensen smiled. "Sorry, looks like you're my first."

"I'll ease you in gently," Jared promised, craning his neck to look down at his leg. "Wow, that's gross. Am I gonna have a scar?"

"Depends on how well you heal up," Jensen said, stitching up his wound, "but hopefully this'll keep scarring to a minimum."

"Hey, I guess it's not like anyone really pays attention to my calves," Jared said with a grin. 

Jensen's eyes lingered on his ass for a second, drifting up to where his gray tee pooled in the dip of his spine, but he reminded himself of appropriate professional behavior as he went back to the sutures. Jared was a patient. There were rules.

"How did you manage to fall and break a pumpkin cage anyway?" he asked, wanting to change the subject away from the parts of Jared's body people did pay attention to. "That takes skill."

"I'm kinda clumsy," Jared admitted. "Accidents just seem to really like happening to me."

"Those assholes," Jensen teased, finishing off the sutures.

"I know, right? There I am, innocently testing out a slightly creepy pumpkin dance cage when I slip on some body oil and shatter the pumpkin and stab myself in the leg. It's a conspiracy."

Jensen smiled, almost sad about needing to send Jared away. He was way more fun to talk to than the usual Friday night patients. Also he hadn't vomited on Jensen's clothes, shoes, and/or hair which won him lots of bonus points.

"Well, I think you're done," Jensen said. "You can live to uncover more of this pumpkin stabbing conspiracy another day." He taped a dressing over the wound and instructed, "Don't get it wet for forty-eight hours. The anesthetic should wear off by the time you wake up in the morning and the stitches should dissolve in a week or two. If it feels hot or swollen, come back in but otherwise you should be set."

Jared smiled sleepily. "I'm gonna remember about six percent of that."

That wasn't really a surprise. "I'll write it down," Jensen reassured. "I don't know how many shifts you work but you're going to need to take it easy for a few days so you don't rip your stitches."

"I'll get Sam to put me on bar duty," Jared said, apparently unfazed. He lifted his head as Jensen finished his clean-up and went to wash his hands. "Thanks, Doc."

"Just doing my job."

"I bet people accidentally calling you a hooker isn't part of your job," Jared pointed out, swinging his legs off the bed as he sat back up. "I mean it though. Thanks for making this not awful and for not judging me to my face about needing stitches because of a pumpkin."

Jensen smirked as he filled out Jared's chart and jotted down a note containing everything he thought Jared was likely to forget. "You're welcome."

"Do you-"

"I'm just-"

They both spoke at the same time but Jared ran his hand through his hair and gestured. "You first."

"I'm just going to go find you an orderly and a wheelchair," Jensen said, passing him the note, "but you're ready to be discharged. Is there someone you can call to pick you up or are you getting a cab home?"

"Since it's 3am, I think I'll go with a cab," Jared said with a yawn.

"Great." Looking forward to the end of his own shift, Jensen asked, "What did you wanna say before I interrupted you?"

Jared shook his head. "Nothing. Don't worry about it."

Jensen wasn't convinced he was telling the truth but he didn't push it. It seemed like an awkward note to end on, given the earlier ease of conversation, and Jensen instantly felt even more awkward for caring about the personal satisfaction obtained from a random encounter with a random patient. Especially when that patient was wearing sparkly underwear and assless chaps.

"Okay," he said, giving Jared an awkward wave. Awkwardness was clearly the theme of the night. "Hopefully I won't see you here again."

Jared's smile was less than enthusiastic. "Yeah," he said as Jensen headed out to find him a wheelchair. "Hopefully."

**+++**

When Jared showed up at the hospital again two weeks later, Jensen decided it was a good thing he hadn't been hoping too hard.

Right up until he got a look at Jared's face, anyway.

"Jesus…"

Jared looked up from where he was laid out on the bed. "Actually it's Jared," he said with a groggy smile, "but I can see how you'd get confused."

Doing his best not to smile at the joke, Jensen held back his grimace when he got a closer look at Jared's injuries. One of his eyes was almost swollen shut and he had cuts on his lips and cheek as well as a wound on his forehead that was still bloody.

"What happened to you?" he asked, grabbing Jared's chart from the end of the bed. Since he was already in a hospital gown, Jensen guessed Aldis had given him a CAT scan before his shift ended but he was pleased to have it confirmed in his friend's scrawled handwriting. "How long have you been here? Do you need anything?"

"Whoa," Jared mumbled. "Slow down, Sparky. One question at a time."

Jensen huffed impatiently but complied. "What happened?"

Jared rubbed his head. "I hit a door." He frowned. "Then I fell down some stairs and hit another door. Also there was a shoe-rack involved."

Despite the shoe-rack excuse (which was honestly a new one), alarm bells went off in Jensen's head. The ward was half-empty, with most of the other patients asleep or not paying attention, but he perched on the side of Jared's bed and kept his voice low as he said seriously, "Jared, if someone did this to you, I can help. We have procedures here -- we can document your injuries and call the police to help you file a report. They shouldn't be allowed to get away with this."

"Agreed," Jared said. "But in this case 'they' were a really loud phone and my roommate's juggling balls. And then the stairs and the doors and the shoes, I guess."

"Are you sure?" Jensen asked, still concerned. "The 'falling down stairs' excuse is pretty common. Hell, I've used it before. There's no shame in admitting it if someone hurt you like this."

"I know," Jared said honestly. "Trust me, if this was anyone else's fault, I'd be pinning the blame totally on them but I really did fall down the stairs. My phone rang super loud and I smacked my head into the door when I went to answer it. Then I lost my balance and tripped over my roommate's juggling balls and fell down the stairs and rolled into the shoe-rack and hit another door."

If it was an excuse, it was a ridiculously elaborate one, and given Jared's history with improbable injuries, Jensen dialed back his worry a little. "You know you can tell me if it wasn't an accident."

"I know," Jared said with a tired smile. "But it was an accident. Swearsies."

Jensen raised an eyebrow. " _Swearsies_?"

"Shut up," Jared said with a smile. "I'm concussed. I can use dumb words." He frowned and sat up a little straighter. "Wait, you used the stairs excuse? When?"

"College," Jensen said, tucking the chart against his chest. "My boyfriend got drunk and punched me in the face." Jared's eyes widened but Jensen added, "I dumped him right after I checked my nose wasn't broken, but the stairs thing was easier than explaining the truth to everyone who asked."

"Man, that sucks," Jared said. "I'm sorry your ex was a giant dickwad."

"Me too," Jensen said honestly. Switching back to things he was actually getting paid to talk about rather than his asshole ex, he asked, "So how are you doing? It doesn't look like there's any intercranial bleeding, which is a good sign, but your chart says you had a headache."

"Headache and throwing up," Jared said with a grimace. "I think the vomiting was because of eating bad fish rather than falling down the stairs but they wanted to keep me in for observation anyway."

"Good choice," Jensen said. "How's your head?"

Jared smiled. "I've had worse hangovers."

"And your leg?"

He jiggled his leg under the blankets. "Almost totally healed. I'm back to shaking my ass on stage like I never got stabbed by a pumpkin."

Jensen laughed. "That's exactly why I became a doctor. To enable on-stage ass-shaking."

"The _Cahoots_ patrons thank you for your dedication," Jared said with mock-seriousness. "Thank you for not judging me too harshly for wearing detachable chaps last time I was here."

"I'm very professional," Jensen agreed. "No costume tonight? When did you come in?"

"This afternoon," Jared said. "If it helps, I was a fireman last night."

Jensen raised his eyebrows. "A fireman? Seriously?" 

"Yup." Jared grinned. "I have now heard pretty much every hose joke in existence."

"How does it work?" Jensen asked. "Do you all just dress up every night and hope that your patrons have a fireman fetish that day, or do you have different costumes? Like the Village People but with more nudity."

Jared rested his head back against the pillows with a smile. "We have themed nights sometimes," he said. "All the dancers and wait staff wear something on-theme but it's not like people pay that much attention to our costumes."

"Do you work during the day?" Jensen asked. He'd never really considered the staffing rotas of strip clubs before but the hospital was quiet that evening so he figured he could make polite conversation for a while. "Or is it just a night-time thing?"

"We're open during the day," Jared said, "but I only work the afternoon and evening shifts. It's like there's something about the pre-noon hours which make people not wanna give decent tips to strippers."

"Crazy."

"Right?" Jared chuckled then put a hand to his ribs with a wince. "I do shifts at an animal shelter during the day, so if I ever come in with bites or anything, that'll be why."

Jensen filed that away for future reference. "I'm guessing you like animals?"

"Who doesn't?" Jared said with a yawn. "I used to want to be a vet but it didn't work out. This is a pretty sweet compromise though: I get to play with dogs during the day then take my clothes off for awesome tips at night. Win-win."

"I'm glad it worked out for you," Jensen said. He stood up, straightening his scrubs and checking Jared's file one more time. "Guess I'll let you get some sleep. Just hit the call button if you feel weird again."

"Weird?" Jared smiled. "Is that a medical term?"

"I'm translating to concussion-speak for you," Jensen deadpanned. "Sleep well, Jared."

He turned away but stopped when Jared called out, "Wait." Jensen turned back and Jared dropped his voice to avoid waking the rest of the patients in the ward. "You can always swing by the club at some point," he said hopefully. "Y'know, if you wanna know anything else about what I do."

Jensen swallowed. "Jared, I-"

"You're my doctor," he said. "I know. I'm just saying, if you wanted to come by, you'd be welcome." He gave him a small smile, which was kind of endearing despite the blood and bruises on his face. "And hey, it's a doctor-themed night a week on Thursday. I'll be all healed up and maligning your profession on a glitter-covered stage."

Jensen smirked. "I'll bear that in mind."

Jared made himself comfortable on the pillows and said sleepily, "Is that a yes?"

"It's a maybe," Jensen answered, not really prepared to commit to any interaction between him and a semi-naked Jared without lots of prior consideration. "Now get some sleep."

Jared's eyes closed obediently and Jensen let out a breath as he turned away, trying to convince himself that Jared as a stripping doctor was absolutely not something he wanted to see.

**+++**

As it turned out, Jared as a stripping doctor was absolutely something he wanted to see.

That was pretty much the only reason Jensen could think of for finding himself outside _Cahoots_ at ten o'clock at night when his shift started at eight the next morning. 

From the outside, the club was slightly less shady-looking than he'd expected (not that he'd dedicated much time to estimating the precise levels of shadyness of strip joints) but once he'd made it past the stocky bouncers on the door and into the purple-lit interior, his apprehension settled into genuine interest. A bar occupied the wall to his left, staffed by a shirtless guy with a stethoscope and an older, fully-clothed woman who seemed to be giving the orders. 

It was busy -- Jensen guessed about a sixty-forty split of women to men -- and he made a pitstop to get himself a beer in order to work up the courage to go closer to the stage, where a young, dark-haired guy was currently divesting himself of his nurse's uniform.

The older woman turned to face him as he approached the bar and Jensen fumbled for his wallet as he said, "Can I get a Bud?"

"Sure thing," she said, eyeing him for a second before moving to fill up a glass. "First time?"

Jensen ran a hand through his hair. "That obvious, huh?"

The woman smiled. "I've been running this place for more than ten years. I can spot a newbie." She slid the beer across the bar and held her hand out for Jensen's money. "It isn't as scary as it looks, I promise. Just sit back and enjoy yourself."

"I'm here to see someone," Jensen said uncertainly. "He, uh, invited me. We're kind of friends, I guess? His name's Jared."

" _Oh_." She pursed her lips and looked at him afresh. "You're the doctor?"

Wondering what Jared had said about him, Jensen took a sip of beer and nodded. "That'd be me."

"Jared should be up in a few minutes," she said. "He's a good guy. Clumsy as all hell but sweet." She smiled at him. "I guess I should apologize in advance for the doctor theme. We're not real big on medical accuracy here."

"I figured it wasn't a priority," Jensen said easily before turning at the sound of renewed cheers from behind him. On stage the dark-haired guy finished his last twirl of the pole and dropped into a bow to the sound of applause.

"Go grab a seat," the woman advised as more people headed to the bar during the break between performers. "Sam'll be up in a few."

Jensen frowned. "Sam?"

"His stage-name," she said. "Most guys like keeping their stripper persona separate from their real identities. I'm pretty sure half of them think they're the Jason Bourne of the exotic dancing community but as long as they show up for work, I'm not gonna complain." She held out her hand. "I'm Sam Ferris, by the way."

"Jensen," he said, shaking her hand then stepping back from the bar. "Thanks."

"No problem," Sam replied. "I've been telling that boy he should date a doctor for years; I'm glad he's finally taking my advice."

"I- We're just friends," Jensen said.

Sam nodded knowingly. "Oh, of course." She smirked. "Go grab a seat, doc. The show's about to start."

Taking his leave, Jensen wove through the crowd of people around the bar to take a seat at a small table a way back from the stage. He'd come to see Jared at work but he still wasn't certain he wanted Jared to see him.

There was a bustle of movement up near the stage as the music started up, a rapid beat that sounded vaguely familiar. 

"Ladies and gentlemen," the announcer called, "put your hands together for Sammy Smooth." 

Jensen nearly snorted at the name -- whatever Jared was, smooth was not it -- but held it back as he watched the lights lining the stage flash red when Jared strolled out. He was dressed in a white coat, blue scrubs, white tee and blue tennis shoes, and if it hadn't been for the catcalls from the audience and the grin on Jared's face, Jensen would've said he almost looked respectable.

The lyrics started up as Jared lifted his stethoscope above his head and arched backwards in a warm-up and Jensen smiled when he finally recognized the remixed song. 

Of course Jared would strip to Robert Palmer. Of course.

Jensen watched as dispassionately as possible as Jared rolled his shoulders, shrugging the white coat down to the floor to reveal the tanned expanse of his forearms and the hint of the curves of his biceps. His skin was coated in something -- Jensen didn't know the technical term for 'stripper oil' -- which made it shimmer and gleam in the flashing lights, and as Jared moved easily to the beat, Jensen couldn't help but feel a little bitter about how good he looked.

No-one was allowed to look that hot in scrubs. It was unfair.

However, he almost wished Jared had kept the scrubs on when he stripped off his scrub top, revealing his tight white tee inch by inch. It clung to every part of him, framing his narrow waist, broad chest and strong arms, and Jensen's mouth went dry when Jared sashayed over to the pole to swing himself around.

He made it look so easy but reaped the reward in the cash that littered the stage and the cheers from the audience. Jensen took a sip of beer to distract himself but had trouble swallowing as Jared hoisted himself up the pole, giving the audience an excellent view of his ass through the cling of his scrub pants.

Expecting Jared to swing around and dismount, Jensen's eyes widened when he stretched out, supporting himself with just his arms as he extended his body almost perpendicular to the pole. 

"Holy crap..."

His comment was drowned out by hollers of praise as Jared spread his legs and spiraled down the pole to dismount with a twirl. Amid the cheers, Jensen caught scattered calls for him to "Take it off!" and he smiled when Jared obliged, hooking his thumbs in the bottom of his tee and pulling it up enough for the audience to get a good look at his abs.

They were really, really nice abs.

Shifting in his seat, Jensen adjusted his pants as Jared rolled his hips in time to the chorus of _Doctor, doctor, give me the news, I got a bad case of lovin' you._ He disposed of his shirt with ease and returned to his acrobatics on the pole as Jensen stared in open-mouthed appreciation.

Jared's scrub pants hung low on his hips, revealing the band of his white underwear just below the dip of his hipbones. His chest was as tan and oiled as his arms, and Jensen decided he should've been way more embarrassed at being turned on by a guy who looked like he'd gone swimming in baby oil. Clearly it was Jared's fault for being so attractive.

He watched the pull and stretch of the muscles in his back and shoulders as he locked his feet around the pole and hung upside down, and he gulped at the sight of Jared's long fingers unfastening the tie of his pants.

If Jensen fantasized about those same fingers untying his own scrubs, that was just a happy coincidence.

He took another swig of beer when Jared lowered his feet to the ground. The gravity tugged his pants down as he went and Jensen jumped at the renewed shrieks that seemed to come from the male and female patrons in equal measure.

Jared grinned, kicking off his pants and walking the length of the stage in his tight white underwear as the music thrummed through the club. People reached up to slip bills inside his shorts but even as Jared accumulated tips, his clothes did nothing to conceal the strong length of his legs or the solid weight of his dick outlined perfectly in the shorts. They clung to the pert curve of his ass, leaving almost nothing to the imagination, and Jensen bit his lip at the insistent pulse of his hardening dick in his jeans.

When it came to maintaining a professional distance, visiting Jared at a strip joint was officially the worst idea ever.

The music built to a climax as Jared scaled the pole one more time and Jensen pressed the palm of his hand to his jeans as subtly as he could. He knew he should leave but Jared was still up there, strong and glistening and mostly naked, guaranteeing that there was no chance Jensen was walking out just yet.

Jared spread his legs wide so that he was almost doing the splits against the metal, and then pushed out with his arms to spin fast around the pole before lowering his legs and facing outwards as he continued to spin. 

It was like watching a gymnast at work, if gymnasts typically had a small fortune in tips stuffed in their underwear. Jensen wondered if there was possibly some witchcraft involved which gave Jared this much grace and coordination when he was taking his clothes off in front of strangers but which meant that he would hospitalize himself on a regular basis due to clumsiness in his free time.

The last beats of the song pounded out as Jared slid down the pole to land on his knees with a flourish. His head was thrown back and his chest was heaving as the crowd applauded wildly, tossing more notes on stage, and Jensen joined in with a slow sincere clap when Jared looked up with a satisfied smile on his face.

The stage lights dimmed a little as Jared got to his feet and collected most of his tips and clothing before jogging off-stage. Dazed and still embarrassingly turned on, Jensen knocked back the last of his beer and judged how best to make a quick getaway. 

Jared really didn't need to see how much his dance had affected him.

Sam's gaze was still on him as he sidled over to the door and he gave her a bashful wave before turning to head out.

"Hey, Jensen!"

Jensen's shoulders sagged.

"Hey," Jared called, bounding up behind him. "Did you enjoy the show?"

Jensen put on the most convincing smile possible and hoped Jared wouldn't look at his pants when he turned around. "It was good," he said honestly, smiling wider at how sweaty and proud Jared looked. That really shouldn't have been a turn-on for him. "You were really good, man. I mean, I don't know how you manage to do all that but can't even answer a phone without falling downstairs and breaking your face."

"It's a gift," Jared said with a grin. He was still in his shorts and tennis shoes but now had his white coat on top to cover him up and Jensen smirked at the 'Dr Smooth' nametag attached. 

"So hey," Jared said, slipping his hands in his pockets, "I'm technically still on the clock but we could have a drink if you wanted? Or we could wait until I'm not dressed like the porn equivalent of you, whichever works."

"I-" Jensen bit his lip. "I need to go. I gotta work tomorrow and I should go get some sleep."

Jared's smile faded a little and Jensen felt instantly guilty at the flicker of disappointment on his face. "Right," Jared said. "Sorry." He smiled hopefully. "Guess I'll see you around at some point?"

Jensen nodded. "Maybe." He didn't trust himself to let his eyes drop below Jared's neck and said quickly as he backed off, "Night, Ja- Sam."

He was out of the door in seconds and was almost glad he couldn't see Jared's face when he called back, "Night, Jensen!"

**+++**

Jensen barely made it into bed before he had his hand down his pants.

Despite the awkwardness of his departure that evening, the memory of Jared on stage still loomed large, and Jensen closed his eyes as he wrapped his hand around his dick to lose himself in the fantasy. He shouldn't have been doing it -- he'd been qualified less than a year and he didn't need a reputation at the hospital as the guy who picked up strippers from the ER -- but his dick had been aching to be touched the whole ride home and he figured one quick jerkoff session couldn't hurt.

He pictured Jared stripping for him, kicking off his shoes and peeling off that stupidly hot white coat and kneeling between Jensen's spread legs as he hooked his fingers in the waistband of his underwear. 

He'd memorized the planes of Jared's chest, the strength in his thighs, the flex of his biceps, and the perfect slide of the dips just above his underwear. Jensen wanted to press his mouth to them, to kiss along the ridges of his hips down to the crease of his thighs as he slid Jared's underwear down his impossibly long legs. 

He wanted to see Jared's ass without the material covering it and he couldn't keep from smiling to himself as he imagined Jared's amused reaction to him squeezing his ass or landing a quick spank to his cheeks just to feel the muscles tense.

He closed his eyes tighter at the thought of Jared's hands on him. If he was strong enough to support his own body weight on the pole like he did, he would have no problem manhandling Jensen into whatever position he wanted, whether it was straddling him to ride his dick or bent over on all fours waiting to get fucked or on his back with his legs spread, ready to take Jared's cock.

Jerking himself off faster, Jensen slid further down the bed and opened his thighs wider, imagining Jared between them. 

A pleasurable shiver went through him at the idea of Jared's hands closing around his ankles and wrists in turn, pulling and tugging until he had Jensen how he wanted him. He pictured the curl of Jared's strong fingers in his hair as he pulled him in for a kiss and he groaned at the phantom feel of Jared's warm, broad palm resting against his cheek as he filled Jensen's eager mouth up with his dick.

"Jesus…."

He wasn't much for noise when it was just him but Jensen bit back a moan at the thought of lying there while Jared's thick cock filled his mouth and throat. He arched back on his sheets, playing with his nipples with one hand and stripping his dick with the other at the thought of Jared fucking his mouth then settling down between his thighs to fill him up completely.

Even in the confines of his stage-wear, Jared's dick looked big and Jensen tipped his head back with a groan at the image of Jared splitting him open on his dick. He pictured Jared holding him down as he fucked into him, toying with him and making him writhe and squirm on his cock.

Close to the edge, Jensen swiped at his damp forehead with the back of his hands and spread his legs wider still, rocking his hips up into the strokes of his hand and into the imagined push of Jared's dick inside him. Jared would be strong, Jensen assumed, and forceful if he wanted him to be, but when he pictured Jared leaning in to kiss him, Jensen guessed he'd be sweet too.

He came at the thought of Jared's lips against his, of Jared's tongue licking inside his mouth while he fucked him open on his cock. He spilled over his fingers, hot and sticky and wet, and opened his eyes with a sigh as he came down from the high.

It took approximately two seconds for guilt to set back in again and Jensen rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand. 

Getting fucked by Jared was much more enjoyable in an imaginary capacity, one when his professional reputation wasn't on the line.

**+++**

"Someone's asking for you."

Jensen looked up from his paperwork. "Huh?"

"A patient," Jeff clarified, leaning against the doorjamb with a smirk. "He's very insistent that he talks to 'Dr Jensen' as soon as possible."

Jensen raised his eyebrows. "Dr Jensen?"

Jeff held up his hands. "His words, not mine. His friends brought him in because they thought someone slipped him something. I told him to go home and just sleep it off but apparently he really, really, really wants to talk to you first. Something about you being pretty?"

Jensen elbowed him in the side as he grabbed the chart from Jeff's hands and headed out. "Shut up."

"Hey, I'm just relaying information here," Jeff called after him, in a tone which let Jensen know this definitely wasn't going to be the end of it. "Now go work on your bedside manner."

Jensen flipped him off as he rounded the corner towards the exam rooms but stopped short in the doorway when Jared greeted him with a broad smile. 

"Jensen!" He turned to the brunette on his right and said happily, "This is Dr Jensen."

The brunette looked Jensen up and down approvingly. "Wow," she said with a smile, "guess he's not imaginary after all. I'll give you those five bucks when you sober up."

Confused, Jensen wandered closer until his arm was promptly grabbed by Jared as though it was a particularly nice stuffed toy. "Uh-"

"He's out of it," the brunette said, running a hand through her hair. "I'm Gen, I'm the one who brought him in."

That didn't explain much. 

Given that Jared's current outfit consisted of a hoodie and spangly blue hotpants, Jensen assumed he'd come from work. Gen, on the other hand, did not look like a girl who worked at an all-male strip joint.

"What happened?"

"Someone gave him something," Gen said while Jared continued his very thorough petting of Jensen's shoulder. "I guess they must've slipped it in his drink or his snacks or something, and it left him like this." On cue, Jared smiled dopily and Gen continued, "The other doctor said it was MMDA?"

"MDMA," Jensen corrected, revaluating Jared's clinginess in light of the new information. He peered at Jared's chart. "Just sleeping it off looks like the best course of action right now."

"That's what the doctor with the beard said."

Jared sniggered and stroked his chin. "Beardy McBearderson."

Jensen made a mental note to write that on Jeff's locker tomorrow.

"But," Gen continued, "drugged-boy wouldn't leave until he saw you. Congrats on not being imaginary, by the way."

"Uh, thanks," Jensen said. He still wasn't entirely sure what he was supposed to do with Jared so asked Gen, "Are you his girlfriend or…?"

Gen snorted. "Nope. I work with him at the animal shelter and I came to see his set at the club tonight." She stifled a yawn. "And I'm gonna go get some coffee so I'm awake enough to drive this yeti home." She patted Jared on the shoulder and called as she walked out, "He's all yours, man."

Unsure whether she was addressing him or Jared, Jensen detached Jared from his arm and tilted his chin up to get a look at his eyes. "So someone slipped you Ecstasy, huh?" he asked gently. "Did they catch the guy who did it?"

"Sam had her suspicions," Jared said, tapping his nose. "They threw him out. Literally." He made a flying motion with his hand and Jensen couldn't help but feel viscerally pleased at the splat motion which followed. "And then Gen brought me here to you. Well, first to the beard doctor and then to you."

"That's-"

"I like you better than beard doctor," Jared continued blithely. He didn't seem that different from usual -- Jensen could easily have written off the way he was swinging his legs as Jared's usual energy -- but his eyes looked almost glazed over. Also he didn't remember Jared being quite this tactile before. (In any situation that wasn't Jensen's private jerkoff fantasy at least.)

"Thank you?" he hazarded.

Jared's smile came and went quickly as he said sadly, "You didn't stay last week."

"At the club?" Jensen tried to look contrite. "Sorry, man, I had work the next day. You were awesome though. Really."

"I get a lot of tips," Jared said, apparently past any kind of shame. "I have a good ass."

He wiggled on the bed. Jensen absolutely did not look down to where the tiny blue hotpants were failing to conceal anything but started when Jared grabbed his hands, sending the chart clattering to the floor.

He smiled up at him. "I like you, Jensen."

"You're drugged, Jared," Jensen replied gently. "This is the Ecstasy talking."

"No," Jared said stubbornly before relenting, "Okay, yeah, I was drugged but this is me talking. I like you. A lot." He looked up at him with a hopeful expression on his face. "Do you like me too?"

Easing his hand free of Jared's grip, Jensen rubbed his eyes. "You seem like a good guy, man."

Jared's face fell. "But you don't like me."

"I do," Jensen said, hoping Jared would interpret that in the most platonic way possible, "but I'm your doctor, Jared. Or at least I was. I can't risk-"

"Do you want me to kiss you?"

Jensen's eyes widened. "Jared-"

Jared cupped his cheeks in clumsy hands and Jensen froze, unable to tear his eyes away from Jared's. His hold was gentle enough that Jensen knew he could probably push him away if he wanted to but he stayed still and silent as Jared asked again, "Do you want to kiss me?"

 _No_ seemed like the obvious answer. 'Inappropriate' really wasn't a strong enough word to describe how messed up the current situation was and as much as Jensen knew that he should leave and distance himself and behave like a sensible, rational adult, he couldn't help but think how Jared's hands on his face were just as big and warm as he'd imagined. 

His eyes were bright and distant though and Jensen licked his lips to try to stop his voice from failing when he said, "I can't-"

The rest of his refusal became a muffled yelp when Jared pulled him into a kiss. 

It was soft, softer than Jensen would've expected for a kiss fueled mostly by chemicals. His lips stayed parted in stunned surprise as Jared fitted their lips together, licking along the line of Jensen's mouth and tilting his head carefully to allow a tentative sweep of his tongue against Jensen's.

The contact was like electricity going through him, shocking Jensen back to reality and making him pull away sharply.

Jared dropped his arms to stop himself overbalancing and looked up in confusion as Jensen backed off, wiping his mouth and hating the hot blush which rose up in his cheeks.

"Jensen?" Even with his drug-induced happiness, Jared looked concerned. "Did I do something wrong?"

Jensen shook his head. "It's just the drugs," he explained, trying to get back into professionalism mode. "It makes those kind of emotions feel stronger than they are. You do things you wouldn't do if you were sober."

Jared looked down, twisting his fingers in his lap. "I'm sorry," he said, sounding wretched. "Are you mad at me?"

"I'm not mad," Jensen promised, retrieving his chart from the floor and fixing his scrubs. His lips tingled still with the memory of the kiss and he wiped his mouth again as he stumbled over his words. "I have to go see other patients now, okay? Get Gen to take you home when she comes back -- you should feel better in the morning when you've slept it off." 

Jared looked at him sadly. Despite the fact that not kissing him any more was a very good decision, Jensen still felt like he'd run over someone's pet. 

It felt like he'd then reversed over said pet a few dozen more time when Jared asked quietly, "Are you ashamed of me?"

"I have to go," Jensen repeated, backing towards the door and trying not to think about the answer to Jared's question. He wasn't technically ashamed of Jared but shame definitely featured prominently in the knot of emotions in his chest, alongside guilt and embarrassment in equal measure. "I'm sorry, Jared."

He almost ran out of the exam room, ignoring Jared's half-hearted calls for him to come back, and he leaned heavily against the locker room door once he'd made it inside.

Jensen's list of relationship failures was not particularly short but a doctor-patient kiss that was technically non-consensual for both parties was now officially at the top.

**+++**

Like the mature adult that he was, Jensen dealt with this personal and professional crisis by avoiding Jared's calls.

He'd kept everything as above board as possible with the kiss by telling Jeff and filing a report, but as much as it felt like the sky was falling, everyone was surprisingly blasé about it. 

(Jeff had told Jensen that a six-year-old girl who was one of his patients had once had a bad reaction to some medication and had spent nearly twenty minutes clinging to Jeff's back and trying to ride him like a unicorn. Jensen was glad Jared hadn't gone down that route; kissing seemed less dangerous than spinal injuries.)

However, despite the lack of repercussions from the hospital so far, Jensen wasn't about to take any more chances.

He wasn't sure who'd given Jared his number. Aldis blamed Kane and Kane blamed Aldis, both claiming the other had seen Jensen mooning over Jared and wanted to help him get laid. Jensen settled for blaming both of them, especially after the first disastrous call when he'd heard Jared's voice on the other end of the line and promptly panicked and dropped his phone in the toilet.

Apparently Jared's clumsiness was contagious.

He'd then programmed Jared's number into his phone as _Possible Life-Ruiner. Do Not Answer._ in order to avoid any more calls and/or phone-in-toilet incidents, but by the time he'd ignored Jared's fourth call, the guilt was starting to set in.

Personally, Jensen thought guilt was kind of a douchebag. It was completely unfair that he felt guilty both for kissing Jared and for not kissing Jared.

Nevertheless, after a week of sticking to his guns and not taking Jared's calls or reading Jared's texts or listening to Jared's messages or doing anything else that could possibly lead to future sex with Jared and eternal damage to his professional reputation, Jensen was convinced the message had gotten through. He'd made a stupid mistake with the accidental drugged kiss but he was never going to see Jared again and everything would be fine.

If he jerked off a couple more times to the thought of Jared fucking him, that was just him needing closure. Orgasm closure was the best kind of closure.

**+++**

"Ackles."

Jensen jolted out of his daydream about just how Jared's glittery blue hotpants would look while he was dancing and raised his head. "What?"

"I got something for you," Jeff said. 

Jensen blinked. "That sounds appropriate."

"Smartass." His lips curved in a half-smile. "C'mon, drag yourself away from your paperwork for twenty seconds."

"Fine," Jensen muttered. Letting out a sigh to make sure Jeff knew how displeased he was about being interrupted -- Jensen's mental picture of Jared looked really good in those blue hotpants, dammit -- Jensen pulled on his jacket and wandered over to where Jeff was standing by the door to the locker room. "What's the-"

He froze when he looked out into the hallway to see Jared slouched in a chair, apparently lying in wait for him.

"What the fuck?" he squeaked, grabbing Jeff by the lapels of his coat and hauling him back inside and out of sight. "What the hell, man?"

"He came in for treatment," Jeff said, evidently unconcerned by how close Jensen was to throttling him. "That kid is definitely getting the most out of his health insurance." Jensen glared at him and Jeff held his hands up. "He wanted to see you and since you've been ducking his calls for nearly two weeks now, I figured I'd help the guy out."

"I wasn't-" Jensen reconsidered. "Okay, I was ducking his calls but for a good reason. We kissed! On hospital premises!"

"He was high," Jeff said dismissively. "You filed a report. It happens."

"But I don't wanna be that guy," Jensen said plaintively. "I worked really hard to get here, Jeff, and I don't want my reputation to be 'that doctor who sleeps with his really hot stripper patients'."

Jeff chuckled.

That really didn't help Jensen's attempts to stay calm.

"That's what this is about?" Jeff asked, peering around the door to where Jared was presumably waiting. "Ackles, you gave the guy stitches one time. Hodge ran the CAT scan when he had a concussion, I checked him over when he was drugged, and Harris just put the cast on his arm today."

Jensen's eyes widened. "He needed a cast?"

Jeff ignored him. "My point, Ackles, is that you haven't technically been his doctor for a while now. You're allowed to have a social life, you know."

Jensen swallowed and looked down at his hands, feeling like a kid again. This whole functioning-adult gig sucked sometimes. "What if people talk?"

"And say what?" Jeff asked. "That you have a good-looking boyfriend who looks after sick animals during the day, gets paid to take his clothes off in the evenings, makes a mean pavlova, and can tie a cherry stem with his tongue?"

Jensen stared at him.

"Hey, he overshares when he's high," Jeff said defensively. "I also know his favorite sexual positions and his preferred flavors of lube but I gotta leave you something to find out for yourself. I'm pretty sure that's part of the mentoring process."

Jensen's brain was still stuck on the idea of Jared in any kind of sexual position when Jeff gave him a nudge out into the hallway. "Okay, that is my limit for motivational speeches today. Go talk to him. Now."

The order was punctuated by a final, more forceful shove and Jensen narrowly avoided faceplanting into Jared's crotch as he stumbled out. 

Righting himself, he gave him a sheepish smile. "Hey."

"Hey," Jared said, pulling himself to his feet. "I just wanted to apologize for what happened the last time I was here. I shouldn't have kissed you like that -- I don't know what I was thinking-"

"You were drugged," Jensen said helpfully. "It really wasn't your fault."

"It kinda was," Jared said. "I know getting your boss to make you talk to me wasn't the best way to do this so I'm sorry for that too, I guess, but you kept ignoring my calls so I didn't know what else to do."

"Sorry," Jensen said, figuring he should probably contribute to the apologyfest that was currently in progress. He tried to work out a good way of saying _'I was too worried about my position in the hospital to talk to you but if it helps, you and your awesome dick have been number one in my spankbank for over a month now'_ but settled for a more concise yet equally accurate summary. "I'm an idiot."

Jared smiled. "Why?"

Always with the difficult questions. 

"I- I was freaking out about stuff I shouldn't have been freaking out about," Jensen said vaguely. "I was an asshole. I'm sorry."

Jared ran his hand through his hair and looked nervous. "Is it the stripper thing? 'Cause that doesn't mean I'd sleep around-"

"No," Jensen stressed. "The stripper thing is good. You are a good stripper. Very good. Outstanding."

Jared's cheeks went pink when he smiled. "Is it the animal thing? Do you have allergies? 'Cause I had this boyfriend-"

"No allergies," Jensen said. "I am pro-animals and pro-guys-who-work-with-animals."

He probably shouldn't have found the idea of Jared holding a tiny little puppy in his big hands so appealing but fortunately he was distracted when Jared asked, "Is it the doctor/patient thing? 'Cause I can try really hard not to injure myself."

"No," Jensen said again, extra-firmly this time. "I checked with my boss. As long as you're not actually my patient, we're good." He looked up at him with a tentative smile. "I promise I'll pick up if you call again."

Jared beamed before looking him up and down. "Are you done for the night?"

Double-checking his pockets for his keys and his cell, Jensen nodded. "Yep."

Jared offered his arm with a flourish. "May I walk you to your car, Dr Ackles?" Jensen raised his eyebrows and Jared grinned. "We had a butler night at the club. I have manners now."

"I'm so proud," Jensen said sarcastically but took Jared's arm anyway as they headed for the staff exit. It felt kind of weird but he was rapidly becoming accustomed to a little extra weirdness when Jared was involved. "What happened to your other arm?"

Jared cringed. "So it turns out you're not the only idiot in the room," he said as Jensen pushed the door open. "I needed to talk to you so I figured that if my arm looked really bruised, I might need to go get it x-ray-ed or something to check it wasn't broken."

Jensen did a double-take. "Wait, you did this to yourself? Jared, if you're self-harming-"

"I'm not," Jared interrupted. He bit his lip. "At least not intentionally?" At Jensen's confused look he explained, "Okay, in hindsight I am fully aware of how dumb this sounds but since I cut my leg open on a fake pumpkin, I'm hoping you have really low expectations of my ability to make good decisions."

Jensen shook his head as they headed towards the parking lot. "Let's hear it."

"We had zombie night at the club a few weeks ago and I had some makeup left over so I tried putting some on my arm to look like bruises," Jared admitted sheepishly. "Stupid idea, I know, but I was painting my elbow when I knocked the brushes off the table. I put my foot down in the wrong place and they rolled out from under me and the next thing I knew I was on the ground with my arm twisted at a weird angle."

He looked over at Jensen. "It would've looked kinda cool if it hadn't actually been _my_ arm, y'know?"

"Let me get this straight," Jensen said, trying not to smile. He really shouldn't be providing any kind of positive reinforcement. "You broke your arm while you were trying to fake a broken arm?"

"Poetic justice, I know," Jared said, stretching out his arm to examine his cast. "With any luck I've filled my hospital visits quota for the whole year now."

"It's December."

"Shut up."

Smiling, Jensen linked his arm tighter through Jared's as they walked down the stairs and out into the cold air of the parking lot. "My car's this way."

Jared gestured in the opposite direction. "My buddy's waiting for me over in the back."

"Call me?" Jensen said hopefully and Jared grinned.

"Definitely," he said. "I'm looking forward to hearing you pick up. It should be a new and exciting experience for me."

"You know, you can stop making fun of me any time you want."

"I'll bear that in mind." Jared backed up a couple of steps and his grin faded to a softer smile when he said, "See you soon, Jensen."

Jensen nodded. "Night, Jared."

He watched Jared walk away as his cold fingers fumbled in his pocket for his keys, and then he turned to find his car once Jared had disappeared out of sight around the corner of the building. 

His lights flashed when he unlocked the car but before he could slip into the driver's seat, he frowned at the vibrations in his pocket.

He couldn't stop the grin that spread across his face when he looked at the display of his phone to see Jared's number (still helpfully described as _Possible Life-Ruiner_ ) flashing at him.

"Hello?"

His hopes that Jared hadn't managed to injure himself horribly in the last ten seconds were confirmed when he was met by Jared's cheerful response, "What's up, Doc?"

Jensen leaned against his car. "I think this is cheating."

"How is it cheating?" Jared said with feigned hurt. "I said I'd call you. I just didn't specify when."

"I'm pretty sure we're about twenty seconds apart right now."

"Quit complaining," Jared said firmly. "I'm trying to ask you out here. You aren't making it easy for me."

"I'm sorry," Jensen said with contrition. "Please ask me out whenever you're ready."

"You can't see but I'm warming up," Jared said. "I'm doing stretches and everything."

"I do only date guys who are limber," Jensen agreed. "A person's ability to warm up well is way more important than their personality."

"Noted and filed." On the other end of the phone, Jensen heard him take a deep breath before saying, "Dr Jensen Ackles, would you like to go to dinner and a movie with me this weekend? I promise not to shove a whole hotdog in my mouth and nearly choke," he added. "Unless you're into that. It is pretty impressive."

"Gee," Jensen deadpanned, "how can I resist a proposition like that?"

He could practically hear Jared's smile through the phone. "Is that a yes?"

"Yes," Jensen said, shaking his head at himself. "It's a date."

"Yes!"

Jensen whirled around at Jared's victory shout and nearly dropped his cell in surprise when he saw Jared leaning against the car right beside his. "What the hell?" He looked between Jared and the corner of the hospital. "But you-"

"I kinda didn't want to wait," Jared said, closing his phone and sliding his hands in his pockets with a tiny shrug. "How would you feel about trying that first kiss again? This time with bonus sobriety."

Jensen smiled up at him as Jared moved in closer, their bodies filling the narrow gap between the cars. "I'd be okay with that. From a purely experimental perspective of course."

"Right," Jared said, lifting his non-broken arm to cup Jensen's cheek with his hand. "Totally for science."

The mist of their breaths mingled in the winter air and Jensen closed his eyes at the first touch of Jared's lips against his own. 

He was warm against him, all firm body and soft lips, and Jensen slid his fingers through Jared's hair as he opened his mouth to let Jared's tongue tickle along the swell of his lips. Jared coaxed him backward, kissing him deeper as he pressed him up against his car and it was all Jensen could do not to grind up against him as he let himself get swept up in the kiss.

By the time they broke apart, Jared's cheeks were flushed pink and Jensen guessed his looked about the same as he sucked in some cold air and tried to compose himself.

Fortunately, Jared said what he was thinking. "Wow. That was so much better than the drugged version."

"Just say no," Jensen agreed. 

A happy little shiver went through him when Jared ran his thumb over his lips before he said with a sigh, "Guess I should go home, huh? Apparently you're supposed to take things easy right after you break your arm."

"Who'd have thought?" Jensen teased. "But no, you definitely should go get some sleep. I'll see you this weekend?"

"I am way too distracted by your face to coordinate shift patterns right now," Jared said, leaning in for another quick kiss, "but I'll text you. There will definitely be you and me date-time this weekend."

"Can't wait," Jensen said honestly. He exhaled as Jared moved out from between the cars, feeling his own tiredness start to set in now that there weren't awesome kisses to keep him awake. "See you soon, Jared."

Jared smiled. "Night, Jensen."

He blew him a kiss before he rounded the corner for the second time that evening and Jensen leaned back against his car, unable to keep the dopey grin off his face. 

It turned out that good things happened when he didn't ignore Jared.

**+++**

"I really want to suck your dick."

Jared's smile was hidden for a second as he pulled his sweater over his head and over the cast on his arm but Jensen felt his grin against his skin when Jared moved in to kiss his way up his neck. 

"Lines from a bad porno?" Jared guessed. "Things you shouldn't say to a priest?" He pulled back to kiss Jensen on the lips before murmuring, "Thoughts that are going through my head right now?"

"Stop playing Jeopardy with my dirty talk," Jensen complained, sounding as sincere as he possibly could when he had Jared's hand on his ass. 

Jared stopped kissing him long enough to crinkle his nose. "I thought dirty talk was more, y'know, _dirty_. Like you talking about my throbbing member or something."

"Do I look like a fuckin' romance novel to you?"

"Okay, no," Jared said, kissing him again as Jensen worked his jeans open. "I don't date romance novels."

Contrary to Jensen's dick's opinion, they had been on a nice, respectable date that evening. They'd had dinner together and watched a terrible romcom, throughout which they'd relentlessly mocked the lead guy and talked about which of his two buddies they would've fucked instead if they were the girl.

(Jared had picked the short dude with the big lips and Jensen had picked the shaggy haired dork. Clearly they were meant to be.)

However, all attempts at respectability had fallen by the wayside once they'd made it inside Jensen's apartment. This had led to them standing in his bedroom, trying to undress themselves and slip their (non-broken) hands in each other's pants at the same time. 

It was not a radically successful strategy but since Jared was still critiquing Jensen's dirty talk, it didn't seem to matter much.

"I'm just sayin'," Jared teased, pulling Jensen's shirt up over his head, "you wanting to suck my dick is just facts."

"Quit mocking me and take your pants off," Jensen muttered, throwing his shirt to the floor and dropping to a seat on the bed as he wriggled out of his jeans, socks and boxers. 

Jared paused, t-shirt half-folded up over his stomach to give Jensen a casual peek at his abs. "Are you gonna give me an exam, Doc? I could use a prostate check."

Jensen grimaced. "Come on, man, prostate exams are the least appealing thing ever." Predicting what was coming next, he cut him off, "And that is not a challenge for you to come up with more unappealing things. Take your clothes off instead. I like naked you."

He was pleased when Jared reconsidered grossing him out further and pulled his t-shirt off instead. His dark jeans rode low on his hips, displaying the cut of his abs and the dips of his pelvis, as well as the blue cast that still covered his forearm. Opting to ignore the injury and focus on the more exciting things hidden under Jared's jeans, Jensen gave up on any kind of restraint as he hooked his fingers in Jared's beltloops and pulled him forward between his spread legs. 

He licked his way along the grooves of his hips, tasting above the line of the denim, and smiled when he heard Jared say above him, "Man, that is totally cheating. How am I supposed to grope you when you're there?"

Jensen laughed against his skin and pulled back to work on the button of Jared's jeans. His dick was almost all the way to hard between his legs and from the thickness that bumped against his fingers when he pulled Jared's zipper down, he guessed Jared was getting there too.

"You can grope me later," he said, pushing Jared's jeans and boxers down his legs and running his hands over his strong thighs and the curve of his ass. Clearly Jensen's own groping took priority. "I wasn't kidding about the dick sucking though."

He made a noise of protest when Jared grabbed the back of his neck and tugged him away from his dick like Jensen was a disobedient puppy, but he shut up when Jared caught his lips in a kiss as he kicked off his jeans and boxers and knelt astride Jensen's lap. 

His body was firm and warm against Jensen's and his kiss was deep and rough, and when Jared's dick rubbed up against his own, Jensen was pretty sure this was the hottest thing he'd experienced in his entire life. 

He decided that there should be a naked, horny Jared on his lap at all times.

"God," Jared murmured between kisses, "your fucking lips."

He pulled back enough for Jensen to blink at him, lips parted in confusion.

Apparently that just made Jared want to kiss him more.

Jared pushed him down onto his back as he deepened the kiss, writhing enough that Jensen could feel the length of his cock brushing up against his stomach. Not about to be denied the dick-sucking he'd been fantasizing about for months now, Jensen used what energy he had to roll them over until he was on top.

He took a second to enjoy the look of surprise on Jared's face at Jensen's stellar manhandling abilities before he decided to celebrate his victory by getting Jared's dick in his mouth. He shifted down his body, giving his own cock a quick jerk as he went, and licked a stripe up the underside of Jared's dick without hesitation.

Jared's groaned response was instantaneous. 

Jensen had always responded well to vocal feedback and he went to work, licking his palm and working Jared's dick in steady strokes while he put his mouth to the head of his cock. Jared groaned again, twisting his hips up as Jensen flattened his tongue against the slit and swirled it around the head of his dick until he could feel the spit coating his lips and chin 

He knew he looked a mess but couldn't bring himself to care as Jared made a garbled noise of happiness and gripped Jensen's hair to guide him down onto his dick. 

He was hesitant at first, which Jensen thought was good manners, as he coaxed Jensen to take the length of his dick in his mouth. Jensen swallowed around it, enjoying the feel of it resting on his tongue and filling his mouth, and he sucked in a breath through his nose before taking him even deeper into his throat.

"Mother crap-"

Jared's strangled sound of pleasure was even louder than time and Jensen pulled off hurriedly to avoid choking on Jared's dick when he laughed.

"Whuh?" Jared asked, dazed and pouty. "Go back to doing that thing. That mouth thing." Seeing that Jensen was still trying not to laugh, he nudged him with his knee. "Oh, so now you do awesome things and then laugh at me when I show my appreciation. Asshole."

Jensen dissolved into more laughter, burying his face in the crease of Jared's thigh, and only laughed harder when Jared moved his hips to make his cock slap against his cheek.

"Fuck you," Jared muttered, putting his hand on the back of Jensen's neck and tugging him up to face-level again so he could kiss him. "How about we stick to non-complicated sex for today?"

He rolled them over before Jensen could argue. Licking inside his mouth, he kissed him thoroughly as he slotted their legs together and propped himself up carefully on his elbows, avoiding jostling his broken arm. 

Jensen was pretty sure his mouth still tasted of cock but Jared didn't seem fazed by that as he curled his tongue against the inside of Jensen's lips.

Jared's cock was still slick with Jensen's spit, providing just the right amount of friction when their dicks brushed together as Jared rolled his hips. Jensen moaned against Jared's mouth at the contact and opened his eyes when Jared began to settle into a rhythm.

"You know blowjobs aren't that complicated, right?"

Jared raised an eyebrow with a grin. "This from the guy who can't even suck a dick without cracking up?"

"You made a noise!" Jensen protested, unable to keep a straight face. At Jared's triumphant expression, he relented, "Okay, fine, blowjobs can wait for the next time."

Jared kissed him on the nose. "Excellent choice."

Jensen batted him away. "Shut up." 

Having a rapid change of heart, he pulled him back in for a kiss on the lips this time as he rocked his hips up in time with Jared's. His dick was trapped in a very enjoyable position between their stomachs with Jared's rubbing up alongside it and Jensen tipped his head back with a moan as Jared trailed messy kisses down his neck and collarbone.

He was hot all over, tingling pleasantly from his toes to his cheeks from the heat of his arousal and the warmth of Jared's body above him. He almost suspected that a furnace had actually disguised itself as his boyfriend, given the amount of heat that was pouring off Jared, but he wasn't about to complain when Jared's mouth was on his and his dick was rubbing perfectly against Jensen's.

Enveloped by Jared's warmth, Jensen was almost taken by surprise at the tightness of his balls and the heavy wave of heat that swept through him when Jared canted his hips down again. He grabbed at Jared's biceps, arching up on the bed and closing his eyes as he murmured, "I'm gonna-"

He came before he could even get the words out. 

Wrapped up in Jared's arms, he shuddered at the rush of his orgasm sweeping through him as Jared kept moving above him, smearing the splashes of come between their dicks and their stomachs as Jensen rode out the pulses. 

When he opened his eyes, it was to find Jared looking at him, and he managed a weak, happy smile as he asked, "You good?"

Jared nodded and kissed him, upper arms straining with the effort to hold himself up. "I'm close," he said against Jensen's lips. "Really, really close. I just-"

Getting the message, Jensen shifted position a little to lessen the stimulation to his own dick while pushing his hips up to meet Jared's movements. Jared let out a moan and, encouraged, Jensen did it again, feeling Jared's dick slide against the streaks of come on his stomach and hips.

"That's it," Jared gasped. "Fuck…"

He ducked his head and Jensen felt the jolt go through him as he came on top of him, coating Jensen's stomach and cock with fresh stripes of come. He dropped down onto one arm and buried his face in the crook of Jensen's neck as he breathed through the last of it, still moving his hips down in a jerky rhythm, and Jensen relaxed against the sheets, running his fingers through Jared's hair. 

"That was good," Jared mumbled, face smushed against Jensen's skin, and Jensen smiled around his yawn.

"Congratulations?"

"I guess you helped," Jared teased, twitching his nose against Jensen's neck before kissing it. "That was great. Did you-"

"Seconding the great," Jensen said drowsily. His whole body felt happily wrung out and he briefly contemplated whether it would be possible to quit his job and spent the whole day having sex in bed with Jared.

"Man, I'm exhausted," Jared said, sounding content. "I didn't even do much except lie there on top of you for a while."

"No sleeping yet," Jensen said half-heartedly. Being the responsible one was not always awesome. "We need to clean up."

"Mneh." Jared shook his head and slumped against Jensen some more. "We can clean in the morning."

"Jared, I feel like the bottom slice of bread in a jizz sandwich right now."

Jared's noise of disgust was long and heartfelt. "Come on, dude. We had good sex. Don't make me think of gross spunk and food combination."

Jensen patted him on the arm. "You'll feel better when you clean up."

Jared sighed. "Fine."

Cold air swept over him when Jared rolled off, scanned the room and then padded to the bathroom. Jensen watched Jared's bare butt with appreciation as he departed and laughed when Jared shook his ass at him.

"Don't injure yourself," he called after him. "Sex would be exponentially worse with more broken limbs."

Jared stuck his disheveled head around the bathroom door. "Okay, you need to quit using long words after we have sex," he complained before disappearing to clean himself up. "You're gonna give me a complex if you keep sayin' things like 'exponen'-"

His words were cut off by the sound of an unpleasant thump from the bathroom and Jensen sat up in concern. "Jared?"

There was a groan and a clunk, which sounded a lot like Jared climbing out of the bathtub, and Jensen failed to hide his smile when Jared's hasty reassurance followed a second later. 

"I'm okay!"

**+++**

_Six months later_

"Well, hey there, gorgeous."

Jensen rolled his eyes as he held his cell to his ear. "You know, I finally see where you get your stage-name," he told Jared. "Mr Smooth was a totally accurate description."

"It's Sammy Smooth," Jared corrected. "And I was just checking in."

Jensen narrowed his eyes in suspicion. "You want something, don't you? Please don't tell me you headbutted anyone this time."

"Nope," Jared said cheerfully. "No headbutts, no failed karate chops, no injuries of any kind. I was just calling to check on my sick boyfriend."

Jensen scowled. "I'm not sick."

His defence was undermined somewhat by the sneeze that followed.

Jared chuckled. "Sure you're not. Are you staying in bed like I told you to?"

Looking around at the nest of blankets and pillows surrounding him, Jensen nodded. "Yes," he said reluctantly.

"Are you drinking that tea I got you?"

"It tastes like donkey piss," Jensen grumbled. "But yes."

"I'm not even going to ask how you know what donkey piss tastes like," Jared said airily. "Did you take your medication? Should I pick up some more on my way home?"

"Yes, I took it and no, I don't need any more yet," Jensen said dutifully. "I can look after myself, Jared."

Jared laughed in his face. (Well, technically in his ear but it felt like it was in the general face vicinity.) "Lies and untruths," he said. "You suck at being a sick person."

"I'm a doctor," Jensen pointed out. "I'm not supposed to be sick."

"Unless you're also a magical being who is forever untouched by illness, I think you're allowed to get sick," Jared said patiently. 

Jensen sighed. He was tired and grumpy and unable to breathe through his nose but it was hard to maintain his desired level of grouchiness when Jared was being so nice to him. 

"How's work?" he asked, wanting to change the subject away from his sinuses. "What time do you finish tonight?"

"I should be home by two," Jared said, "then I will hug you and pet you and squeeze you and call you George to your heart's content."

Jensen did not mean to sigh quite so happily at the idea of being petted by Jared. Stupid flu.

"What are you wearing tonight?"

Jared chuckled. "Was that a come-on or…?"

"I'm sick," Jensen defended. "I need something to make me feel better."

"Well, I guess if it's for medicinal purposes…" Jared teased. "Tonight I'm wearing my chaps, cowboy boots, a cowboy hat and a leather jacket with rhinestones on it."

"Classy."

"I am the classiest," Jared agreed as Jensen snuggled down in his blankets, gladly picturing Jared's outfit.

"What color is your underwear?"

"Way to jump right in there, Ackles," Jared said. "I'm wearing the red pair tonight. The ones with the devil horns on the ass."

Jensen smiled sleepily. "I like the red pair."

"You have terrible taste," Jared told him. "You're lucky I love you anyway."

"I know." Jensen yawned and asked hopefully, "Wear them home?"

"So you can fall asleep in my lap and drool on them some more?" Jensen could hear the smile in his voice. "I'll check if we have a sexy hazmat stripper costume I can wear home. That way I can be both attractive and health-conscious."

Jensen curled up against his pillows as he said honestly, "I wouldn't be against it."

Jared laughed. "Look, my break's nearly over. I'll be home soon but look after yourself, okay?"

"I will," Jensen promised. "Bring the sexy hazmat costume."

"I don't know if that exists," Jared said, "but I'll do my best. Love you."

"Love you too," Jensen replied. 

He hung up and let the phone drop somewhere in the nest of blankets as he snuggled deeper into the bed. Unable to keep his eyes open any longer, he let them drift closed as he waited for Jared to get home and deliver on the promised hugging and petting and squeezing. 

If he happened to fall asleep before then and have detailed dreams about Jared in a sexy hazmat outfit, he could totally blame it on the flu.


End file.
